Tuesday, November 25, 2008

30 Rocks

Have you been watching 30 Rock like I keep telling you to? You should be. The third season has been great so far. Even Sesame Street is getting in on the act:



The character spoofs are soooo spot-on.

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Monday, November 24, 2008

R. E. Why?



This weekend, for the first time in my life, I went to an REI (which apparently stands for Recreational Systems, Inc.) It was awful. Here's why.

1.) It was so big. I got lost TWICE while I was there.

2.) The employee uniforms are beyond ugly. Seriously, what's with the Home Improvement vests?

3.) Greenwashing. Big box stores do not get to claim environmental responsibility. Sure, some effort is better than none, but I know an easy way to reduce your emissions, REI - build smaller stores.

4.) Too outdoorsy! I care about nature and all, but I'm a city person through and through, so being surrounded by tents and snowboards was alarming.

5.) Too expensive! If I'm spending $100 on a vest, that vest better be made out of elephant or some shit.

6.) So suburbanite. To quote Liz Lemon, "I haven't seen this many white people in tuxedos since the Titanic." (Substitute "North Face" for "tuxedos.")

In conclusion, I hated it. I also managed to swallow my convictions for long enough to spend $15 on a travel mug, so yeah, I'm pretty lame to bitch about all of this. Damn my lack of willpower!

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Thursday, November 20, 2008

Happy Birthday, Biden!

This is too damn cute.

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Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Vindictive Much?

I have to share a point of personal triumph I experienced today. I was flipping through our substandard student newspaper and came across this article, which tells of a lecturer here at U of M, Lawrence Greene, quitting for the rest of the term after some severe ethics allegations came out against him:

The Monday WXYZ news segment reported that Greene cashed his deceased parents' pension checks and featured interviews with nine former clients of Greene's who alleged that he collected thousands of dollars from them and failed to do the work for which he was paid.


Here's some backstory for I'm rejoicing in this. I took a class about the American court system with Lawrence Greene during my undergrad years, and it was by far the worst course I ever took. He was an awful lecturer who stood at the front of the class reciting dates that we should know without giving us any sort of insight into the cases he was telling us about. Halfway through the term, I stopped going. (Not my best option, I realize, but mean, I was 19.) During this time, he changed the date of the final without sending an e-mail or anything to the rest of the class. I showed up on the original date of the final and was all "uhhhhh..." before learning the final was already due. I was able to turn it in late, but I still got a B-, which is the worst grade I've ever received.

In conclusion, HA HA HA, Larry Greene. I always knew you were an awful person, and now my formerly irrational feelings of intense dislike feel justified. Can I petition to get my grade changed now?

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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Nevertheless, She Was a Mess

Dear blog readers,

I know there are only maybe 2.5 of you, but I just wanted to apologize for the infrequency of my blogging as of late. Between a pickup in schoolwork and a sudden influx of friends visiting town, I've been unable to devote as much time writing about nothing as I would like to. I'll try to get back on the horse soon.

Love,
Brian

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Thursday, November 13, 2008

Pork the Pain Away

So yesterday, when I should have been doing schoolwork, I instead began watching Muppet-related YouTube videos with a friend of mine. (This is a more common occurrence for us than one would think.) We stumbled across this gem, in which someone set clips of Miss Piggy to "Fuck the Pain Away" by Peaches. Even for non-Muppet fans, this should be enjoyable. (Although that's coming from quite the Muppet fan, so I'm not really the most unbiased source.)

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Abundance of Greenery

I have a strange sort of problem.

I have too much bok choy.

A friend and I were cooking together on Saturday and purchased a mind-bogglingly enormous head of bok choy at the local farmer's market for a mere $2. It made a delicious addition to our stir fry, but even after using a lot of it for that purpose, I still have plenty left. Any suggestions for what to do with it all?

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Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Some Morning-After Thoughts

I don't need to tell anyone how big of a deal it is that we elected Barack Obama our president last night. Instead, if you'll bear with me, I'm going to engage in some sentimentalism about my own feelings about this election. It may even cross over into maudlin territory at times. Consider yourself warned.

I wasn't on the Barack Obama love train at first. I'm still not ashamed to say that I supported Hillary in the primaries, mainly because I felt that at the time, Obama hadn't really solidified what he meant when he said "change." I think the long primary season actually forced him to hammer down that message, and as we entered the general election, he was a much stronger candidate because of it. Feeling more comfortable that I had a sense of what an Obama presidency would look like, I finally allowed myself to get swept up in the amazing speeches and the excitement of what could really get done if we made this man our president. Shit, I even gave him $25. (That's hard for a grad student!)

So, like so many people did last night, once Barack finished speaking, I cried. (But only a little.) I cried because for the first time in my adult life, I would have a president I could feel confident in. I cried to release all the stress I had put myself through while worrying about the prospect of a McCain presidency. I cried out of joy. But I think I cried mostly because I had convinced myself it couldn't happen. I had told myself that America was too racist to elect any non-white person president, and I thought they wouldn't be able to go through with it, despite all the favorable polling. Hell, if you had told me 4 years ago that in 4 years, we would have a black president, I would have told you that we'd be lucky to have one in 40 years. My mother, born in 1949, thought until recently she would never see a black president. So as it sunk in for me that he had actually won, and by such a large margin, I cried out of extreme satisfaction to know that I was wrong.

Now, that's not to say we've eliminated the racial problems we have in this country, and it's not to say that I'm always going to agree with the decisions Obama makes as president. I'd like to think that I'm going to be able to maintain objectivity as his administration moves forward and truly assess whether he's making the right decisions. But for now, I'm content to revel in this amazing moment.

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Barack Obama FTW

Holy shit.

It actually happened.

I can't stop grinning.

More tomorrow.

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Tuesday, November 4, 2008

It's About Damn Time

HOLY SHIT.

It's finally Election Day.

Why I need this day to be over:

Stress-eating - I have been a cow this past week. The more fried or chocolatey something is, the better. Once I know the outcome today, I can go back to drinking my stress away.

Nightmares - I actually had a nightmare last night that Minnesota went red. Of all places! I need to not be subconsciously fretting about this election.

Productivity - Who can do homework when there are so many stupid blogs and news stories to read?

ARGH. I'll be back tomorrow to gloat (if this day ever ends, anyway.)

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Saturday, November 1, 2008

Teehee

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